Friday, February 2, 2007
Excellence Training
Excellence Program (No Excuses) :
(No Excuses: Tell me 3 things you've tried to genuinly get results and tell me 3 things you could have done before you forward explanation of not achieving goal)
No more work. Earn $ with excellence points (ep's)
Proposal: excellence points
can buy priviledges (driving lessons, party, etc.) with excellence points.
can gain excellence points at anything.
get paid a maximum excellence points worth $100/week, if she earns more she can roll them over. I can choose to give her more when I think it necessary.
she has to keep track of her ep's written down, I have to sign it for it to be good.
can never lose ep's
can gain sloth points
sloth points can be gained by:
(No Excuses: Tell me 3 things you've tried to genuinly get results and tell me 3 things you could have done before you forward explanation of not achieving goal)
No more work. Earn $ with excellence points (ep's)
Proposal: excellence points
can buy priviledges (driving lessons, party, etc.) with excellence points.
can gain excellence points at anything.
- cooking (doing it well, getting a wider range of meals, improvising, etc.)
- cleaning
- school (paying attention, quiz, projects, tests, homework, interaction with people, doing something good for people, helping fellow students, looking out for people, making someone's day, etc.)
- usually a 90%+ effort when doing any activity. An effort of 100% will double ep's.
- any unusual activity that I would approve of.
- how she treats people, socializing beyond her comfort zone, activities that build her as a person.
- Studying (SAT, etc.), taking initiative: doing things you see need doing without being told to do it, completing things started,
get paid a maximum excellence points worth $100/week, if she earns more she can roll them over. I can choose to give her more when I think it necessary.
she has to keep track of her ep's written down, I have to sign it for it to be good.
can never lose ep's
can gain sloth points
sloth points can be gained by:
- being late to school, being "rude" to teachers or fellow students, any disrespectful behavior.
- Lying: being defensive, being rude/disrespectful, not taking responsibility
- any grade (quiz, test, project) under a 'B'
- not counting grades under a 'B'
with sloth points I can choose to deny a priveledge she seeks to buy
Short term goals (school):
at least a B in every class this marking period
an A in all classes in 4th marking period.
Longer term:
maintaining an A average in senior year.
I want the most asked question to me or to yourself be "what do I need to do to be a 10"
Thursday, February 1, 2007
Knowledge Blinds
Amanda is working at Pathmark now. She doesn't have a set schedule yet but for now, she is working from 4pm - 8pm. This conflicts with her TKD classes so it will have to change.
Knowledge Blinds - Explained
She had a grade of 107 on a vocabulary test. She had 3 problems wrong on the test. She said that she did not study. I told her the importance of studying and of the block/blindness that one acquires from knowing that she knows. I told her that she has the tendency to not see things if she already knows it. I told her that if she studies her vocab and she thinks that she already knows the words then she would give a cursory glance of the material not an in-depth look at it. I explained it to her and she agreed that that is the way it is.
Knowledge Blinds - Demonstrated
Later, I gave her a printout with her kicking combinations on it and told her to look it over and tell me if that is the combination that she knows. Initially, she said that it was the combination. In the car driving to the dojo I told her to tell me what her kicking combo was in detail. She broke it down move by move for me. I asked her for a 2nd time to verify that what she just described to me is what was written on the paper. She looked at the paper again and confirmed that the detailed step-by-step combo she just described was what was written on the paper. I told her that what was on the paper was different than she described and told her that she didn''t see it because she already knew what she was reading.
She read it for a 3rd time and told me what was written and how it was different from what she described. I told her again that she wasn't seeing what was written. I told her to forget everything she knows and then read it again and pay attention to what she was reading. She did and she read what was there and told me what she read. Both things were finally congruent.
I then proceeded to go over everything that just happened and explained to her why she had to read it 4 times before she finally got it. She was aware of what I was saying the first time I explained it to her but I don't think my point was driven home until she experienced that knowledge blinds. I told her about beginner mind and how to adopt it when she listens to or reads something that she already knows.
I then explained to her that this blindness extends into many different aspects of her life. I told her that when she decides that someone is a particular way then she sticks them with it, even years later. I told her that people change every day and she should not "know" certain thinks about them. They may have changed in that aspect of them that you "know" a long time ago. Because you already know this, you become blind to how they really are and you find reasons to make them the way you "know" them. I gave her a few examples of how she knew her mother and me and I gave her examples of how I knew her. I told her that I knew how irresponsible she was and when I listened to her differently and saw that she was not irresponsible anymore.
I then told her and gave her examples of how this extends to how she is with other people and how she is with herself and the domino effect it has on the rest of and the quality of her life.
I then brought it back to her studying and told her that if I tell her to do something when it comes to school, it has nothing to do with grades. School is just a training ground for developing and practicing the skills that make you a great & successful person who love your life and everything in it.
Knowledge Blinds - Explained
She had a grade of 107 on a vocabulary test. She had 3 problems wrong on the test. She said that she did not study. I told her the importance of studying and of the block/blindness that one acquires from knowing that she knows. I told her that she has the tendency to not see things if she already knows it. I told her that if she studies her vocab and she thinks that she already knows the words then she would give a cursory glance of the material not an in-depth look at it. I explained it to her and she agreed that that is the way it is.
Knowledge Blinds - Demonstrated
Later, I gave her a printout with her kicking combinations on it and told her to look it over and tell me if that is the combination that she knows. Initially, she said that it was the combination. In the car driving to the dojo I told her to tell me what her kicking combo was in detail. She broke it down move by move for me. I asked her for a 2nd time to verify that what she just described to me is what was written on the paper. She looked at the paper again and confirmed that the detailed step-by-step combo she just described was what was written on the paper. I told her that what was on the paper was different than she described and told her that she didn''t see it because she already knew what she was reading.
She read it for a 3rd time and told me what was written and how it was different from what she described. I told her again that she wasn't seeing what was written. I told her to forget everything she knows and then read it again and pay attention to what she was reading. She did and she read what was there and told me what she read. Both things were finally congruent.
I then proceeded to go over everything that just happened and explained to her why she had to read it 4 times before she finally got it. She was aware of what I was saying the first time I explained it to her but I don't think my point was driven home until she experienced that knowledge blinds. I told her about beginner mind and how to adopt it when she listens to or reads something that she already knows.
I then explained to her that this blindness extends into many different aspects of her life. I told her that when she decides that someone is a particular way then she sticks them with it, even years later. I told her that people change every day and she should not "know" certain thinks about them. They may have changed in that aspect of them that you "know" a long time ago. Because you already know this, you become blind to how they really are and you find reasons to make them the way you "know" them. I gave her a few examples of how she knew her mother and me and I gave her examples of how I knew her. I told her that I knew how irresponsible she was and when I listened to her differently and saw that she was not irresponsible anymore.
I then told her and gave her examples of how this extends to how she is with other people and how she is with herself and the domino effect it has on the rest of and the quality of her life.
I then brought it back to her studying and told her that if I tell her to do something when it comes to school, it has nothing to do with grades. School is just a training ground for developing and practicing the skills that make you a great & successful person who love your life and everything in it.
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